October 26, 2113
Joker
was back at his hideout "...Batsy, GODDAMMIT BATS ANSWER ME!" he
shouted into the walkie talkie. "Bats must be away from his
vee-HIC-el..." He stressed the H sound in vehicle "...or he's in it and
can't hear over the engine. Oh well, I’ll surprise him later at some
point. I suppose I should have put a tracking device on him as well.
CURSE YOU HINDSIGHT!" He grinned. Joker went along to envision his next
plot.
Later in Batman’s Lair "Giancarlo C....Oh fuck this, I need a
break." He looked up at a picture on the wall. "Great Grandpa Bruce,
what a guy, left us a fortune and an enterprise... and a name that you
can never hide from. *sigh* how did you do it? how did you manage to
keep a personal life with all the reporters and paparazzi and such." He
banged his head on the wall and the picture fell. " The hell is that?"
There was a button behind the portrait. He pushed the button and a
grandfather clock across the room slid apart from the wall. "Well well I
guess there is more than one mystery to solve tonight..." He smiled for
the first time in years at the thought of there being secrets in this
house. Brad always loved a good mystery. He walked to the door and down a
long winding staircase and found himself in a cave, but not just any
cave "...THE BATCAVE!" He almost collapsed when he saw the original
Batmobile's and the suits and memorabilia of villains past. He walked
towards the computer dragging his index finger on everything he past.
He went to turn on the computer to see if it still worked...all he could
think was think now was " How did grandpa hide all this...”
A little
while later Joker sat in his room pondering. "OK well any good super
villain has a gang of expendable thugs so I suppose that’s' my next
step..." He grinned at the thought of being an overlord with minions and
such. "...now I suppose the next logical question is where do you get a
gangs worth of miscreants when crime doesn't run the streets like a kid
hopped up on a sack of Pixie Stix as it used to...hmmm...I KNOW!" and
with that he left his hideout, but returned moments later to grab the
Walkie talkie " Let’s give this another try..."
At that same time
Brad had finished looking around the Batcave and had found the secret
entrance and decided that it would be best to keep his Batmobile in
there as well for safe keeping. He had finished checking the secret
entrance and had figured a way to manipulate an old garage door opener
to work on the same signal so he could get in and out quickly and
quietly, so he went out to the Batmobile and uncovered it. As he was
about to get in he heard a voice, "...BATSY! OOH I HATE YOU! WHERE THE
HELL ARE YOU!?! I HAD A GREAT IDEA AND YOU ARE RUINING IT! BAAATS!"
Brad found the walkie under his wheel well and ripped it off its taped
hinges. "Who is this?" Batman said into the Walkie. "Oh Bats you finally
decided to join my chat party, well it's me again your unfriendly
homicidal neighborhood Joker..." He cackled in-between speaking "...well
anyway just wanted to let you know if you ever wanna just chat or
anything you can always pick up this direct line and get through to
me...I'll always be here for you Batsy...HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!" Brad clicked
off the walkie and continued to hide his Batmobile. "This may be useful
later" He thought to himself and threw it in the backseat.
"Bats,
BATS, BAAATS!, Dammit he hung up on me, that miscreant Son of a bitch."
Joker hissed through jagged yellowed teeth. "oh well guess I’ll wait for
him to come to me." He smiled a frightening yellow grin as he pulled
his car over next to a juvenile detention center. "well if this Bat is
anything like the comics he'll be furious that I enlisted kids, and more
so..." He growled the next few words "....he won't beat on them so
hard,.." Then in a high pitched almost singsong voice "....and if he
does, well bonus for mee-hee! AHAHHAHAHA!" he got out of the car and
approached a group of kids, no older than 15 or 16, hanging close to
the fence that imprisoned them. "Hey kids wanna bust out of this dump?"
The kids all looked at him with wishful, yet frightened eyes. None of
them would dare get too close to the gate where this horrific clown was
standing, menacingly grinning. "oh c'mon kiddies, Uncle Joker's not
gonna harm you, I have a proposition for you all, and anyone else you
wanna bring along." A tall slender and muscular European looking teen
stepped up to the gate " I want out, what you offerin'?" Joker's eyes
widened with joy and the prospect of his minions being so easy to
obtain. "What’s your name son?" The kid said "My name is Bayne and I
want out so how we gonna do it?" Joker said "seriously?, your name is
bane?" Bayne eyed joker hard "Yeah what of it?!?" He Said through
grinding teeth. "Oh nothing, just the irony in all this strike me as a
bit too coincidental, but whatever, roll with the punches I always say,
anyway, Well Bayne, here's the plan, first imma need you to gather as
many associates as you can that are willing to commit crimes like never
before, second ..."
Back at Wayne manor: "so how does all this work?"
Bruce was standing in front of this massive computer terminal and
couldn’t find the on button. he pressed every button, he checked every
nook of the machine, nothing "Dammit I can’t get this friggin COMPUTER
ON!!!!!" just as he said that the computer came to life. "Voice
analysis, voice not recognized, patterns similar to owner, please place
your finger on the printing pad to your lower left" a bright red
fingerprint display lit up at his side, and brad placed his finger on it
"OW!" he got pricked in the finger, "DNA analysis complete, Wayne DNA
found, Welcome Mr. Wayne." "Uh, hello?..." Brad muttered. "Please have a
seat Mr. Wayne while I update my database. Updating system, current
date October 26 12:24 AM, loading video will" A loading screen appeared,
when it was done loading a haggard old face appeared on the screen
"Granpa Bruce?" "Hello descendant, if you are seeing this video I can
only assume 2 things one you discovered my secret, and 2 crime is on the
rise again, I programmed the computer to only play this video for
someone of my lineage and only after accessing the police criminal
database to ensure you have no criminal record, and that there was a
need to even play this. That being said I’m sure you've figured out by
now that I was the batman. Now you have a choice, you can tell the
computer to shutdown and it will. you walk away and forget you ever saw
this, or you can tell it to continue. If you tell it to continue it will
monitor you forever, it will ensure that you use any gadgets in here
for only good and if you use any of it for evil, it will shut down and
send a distress signal to the police after subduing you. I will not
tolerate anyone ruining the Wayne family name." Then the video paused
and the computer voice came back on "Please make a selection, continue
or shutdown?" Brad stood there for a moment, he thought about what he
would do, he thought about how he was already doing this why not get
some upgraded gadgets... "Continue" Bruce came back on "Good, I hope you
made the right choice not only for yourself but for all of Gotham. Well
let’s take a tour of the place if you will direct your attention to the
autoscreen approaching you we can continue...." Brad look over at a
piece of junk on wheels with a monitor on it where Bruce’s haggard old
face was waiting to continue the tour.
"...so the clown said be by
this wall at exactly 1am , so where the fuck is he?" "I don't know he
just told me to gather you guys and be here now shut up and wait, what
do you have to lose?" Bayne crossed his arms and leaned against the
brick wall like Joker told him to. "its 12:58AM Bayne, where the fuck is
he?" "I dunno, but Listen he very specifically said this wall, he
stressed it lots I don’t think you should be over there." "Pfft what’s
gonna happen is he gonna bust through the..."
BOOM!
"OH YEAH!
HAHAHA I've always wanted to do that HAHAHHAHAHAHA!" Joker yelled as he
busted through the wall in a school bus adjacent to where Bayne was
standing. Bayne stay there unmoved, and unhurt. however his bullheaded
associate was not in quite the same shape. The Alarm blared. "Hey Kiddos
hop in ASAP, we need to make like a crack head and burn
rubber...HAHHAHAHA! hey what happened to that guy he looks like humpty
dumpty... threw up." Joker snickered and the seven remaining kids jumped
in the bus and Joker kicked it in reverse rolling over 2 guards in the
process. "GO AHEAD THROW EVERY LAST MAN AT ME! ILL JUST MAKE THEM ROAD
PIZZA! Hey anyone else hungry? DAMN YOU PIGS NOW I WANT PIZZA....WITH
BACON! AHAHAHAHHAHAHA!" Joker screamed and laughed out the window, then
in a very casual voice, almost as if none of this was even going on and
they were simply having a drink at a bar joker turns to the children "So
what’s everyone’s name? c'mon don’t be shy now better we die friends
than strangers, um not that were GONNA DIE, but it is one of the
possible outcomes....." Silence took over the bus until Bayne started
pointing to each other teen very relaxed in the bus "That’s Oz, Deuce,
Vic, Ed, Alucard and Krane, so now what do we do boss?" Jokers smile
widened "Boss? I like the sound of that, well boys under your seats you
will find some masks and a bunch of weapons, those pigs are giving chase
so open the windows and have a blast...no pun intended...oh who am I
kidding AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA!" Joker, still driving like a madman, pulls
onto a highway doing top speed in the bus. The teens all put on their
clown masks except Bayne, he just threw on his sunglasses. they all
grabbed various weapons and started firing out the windows. Bayne took
some chains and secured himself between 2 aisle seats in the last row
and kicked open the back doors of the bus. he then let loose flurries of
grenades on the pursuing cop cars. "DIRECT HIT BAYNE MY BOY!" Joker
screamed as several of the trailing cars exploded and crashed, then to
himself he said, "I really like that boy I may have to make him my
protégé....ohhooo good times ahead boy good times ahead, YOU HEAR THAT
COPPERS GOOD TIMES AHEAD AND THERES FUCK ALL YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT! YOU
HEAR ME! oh wait I guess it would be kinda hard to hear with all that
windshield jammed all in your skull like that AHAHAHHAHAHA......"
A short while earlier:
"...and
over here we have we have the Batsuits past present and future."
Bruce’s floating video head rolled along announcing the suits like a
museum curator." As you can see we have the originals without armor
which were rendered useless almost immediately as the criminals of
Gotham do not believe in the honor of fighting without guns, and then we
get into the ones that have bullet proof armor, and then impenetrable
armor. The impenetrable armor came to be needed with criminals like
Killer Croc around who could literally bite a car in half. He tried to
take a bite out of me more than once. Over here we have the Beyond suit
with flight technology, enhanced strength and a number of other
interesting abilities. This will be the handiest until you finish work
on the prototype suit over here. I figured with the 'Beyond Technology'
and a few enhancements..." An Alarm sounded, the computer paused Bruce's
video, it then advised "Warning police chase along the Gotham River
Drive Highway. Suspect Kidnapped several children in a school bus. Bus #
6913. Suspect is armed and dangerous, several officers down. Explosives
in use..." Brad froze in place for a moment, snapped out of it and
grabbed the nearest suit which happened to be the prototype suit,
without even thinking. He jumped in the Batmobile and went. "I have
taken the liberty of syncing myself to your vehicle to better assist
you. Would you like to turn on autopilot?" Brad was astonished that his
great grandfather had technology that was almost up to par with the
current technology nearly a century ago. "Yes" He replied. While
computer drove, he put on the suit. His cowl almost looked like what you
would expect Nosferatu's skull to look like it even had fangs. there
was no cape on this suit. It shone like motor oil in a puddle. There
was a Tribal tattoo looking design on the chest. It was a Bat. "That's
cool" Brad said to himself out loud. inside the cowl Computers voice
spoke over speakers mounted slightly behind brad's ears. The eyes lit up
and then immediately dimmed. the suit shone an iridescent glow. it was
changing colors and adapting to his surroundings. he looked down and
couldn’t see his legs anymore, then his hands disappeared from the
steering wheel, he was invisible like a chameleon. "Cool" he muttered
with a prideful smirk. in the upper left corner of his goggles he
noticed "NRM" glowing fluorescent green. "computer define goggle option
NRM." Computer responded " NRM, Normal Retina Mode. While in NRM you see
the world as you would without filters except clearer..." Everything
sounded clearer and louder even over Computer's digital voice. and she
was right it looked crisper too. "...you may adjust focus to your
optical liking." Brad thought he would like a sensor that detected
threats approaching and highlight them. "Computer note highlight
threats." He stated. "Noted" she replied. "Computer what are my optional
filters?" Computer went into detail on several filters while auto
piloting the Batmobile to the scene of the disturbance. "...Lastly there
is THRM, Thermal Heat Recognition Mode, while in THRM. --BEEP--
Approaching disturbance. Target ahead on left" Computer automatically
changed his display back to NRM. "I see him..."
Joker was swerving
like a drunkard, not due to alcohol but just because he felt like it. He
smashed into cars on both sides of the street like a ping pong ball.
Inside the bus joker was finishing a joke "...so the king says 'KING
KONGS BALLS I SAID PING PONG BALLS!' AHAHAHAHHAHAHA I Kill me, and
anyone else I want for that matter, wait did I make that joke already?
SHIT, need new material already. what’s this world coming too when the
joker has to repeat jokes..." Joker paused on this thought for a sec.
for just a split second it looked as though joker was seeing the
severity of what he was doing, but then he was right back where he was a
moment ago. "HEY BOSS!..." Bayne Yelled from the rear "...I think we
has a prollem." Joker took his eyes off the road and directed them to
his side mirror. “Nothing on my side..." He said looking into the
driver’s side mirror, he then turned his attention to the passenger side
mirror, "...well what do we have here? OH LOOK BOYS IT’S THE BAT! YAY!
AHAHAHHAHAA, well we're not fully prepared for him yet, so get rid of
him." Bayne detached himself from his "seatbelt" rig of chains. he
looked under all the seats and collected all the explosives he found. he
closed the back door and went to work.
"Computer pull up behind the
bus and open the hatch. Computer initiate THRM. I don’t like that they
closed the doors." The Batmobile positioned itself behind the bus and
the hatch opened. As soon as it did the back doors burst open again and a
volley of random explosives came spewing out of the back. "COMPUTER
CLOSE HATCH!" The hatch closed and a fireworks display of explosions
ensued. The windshield of the Batmobile shattered. The hood came off, if
not for the reinforced steel surrounding the cockpit Batman would have
been done. the Batmobile shifted and crashed. "Computer you there?" "I
am here sir" Computer replied. "Computer are you still able to control
the Batmobile?" Batman groaned. "Yes" her staticy computer voice
affirmed. "Take me home please" The Batmobile sputtered and wobbled but
it made its way back to the Batcave.
"Well that was fun, we're almost
there boys. Good job losing the bat back there, Bayne my boy I like
your style." They pulled up to a Deserted Craka-Cola factory. " Here we
are. I know it looks like shit form the outside but the inside is...well
the insides fucked up too but home is where the heart is and all that
jazz.." They pulled the school bus around back and got out Joker led
them through a hole in the wall that led to a corridor and over to some
decrepit stairs. "Up this way boys, so you'll each have your own room do
with it as you please. ok so we've established Bayne is the muscle of
the group, who's got the brains?" Bayne replied, "Vic and Krane are the
nerds.." Vic stopped dead in his tracks and turned to Bayne, "Who the
fuck you calling a Nerd ya mutant son of a bitch? I'm madd smart but I
ain't no fuckin Nerd." Joker stepped between them, "Boys, Boys Boys, no
need to fight you have your freedom, a roof over your head, and a new
job, let’s try to be more positive ok? Cause if not I may have to rip
out someone’s eyes with a chopstick..." He just stood there and smiled
at both of them " Good then it’s settled, anywho, so Vic, Krane, are
either of you 2 any good at chemistry?" "I am" Krane said. Krane was a
scrawny looking Goth kid. He wasn’t the shortest but definitely the
smallest of the group. They started walking again. "Wonderful, Krane
this is your room then" Joker pointed to a room on the left, " It has
any chemicals, beakers, tubes, whatsits, and thingys you might need,
redecorate anyway you want just make use of that shit, I want gasses,
poisons biological anything and so forth, go. Now who's the best at hand
to hand, and Bayne brute strength does not make a great fighter so
don't even raise your hand." Joker stopped and about faced. the troop
stopped "That would be me" Deuce stepped out of the shadows He raised
his head. "WHOA What the fuck happened to you? You get into a fight with
an envious cyclops or something?" Joker mused. Deuce was 5ft 5in just a
tad shorter than Joker. He had a serious scar going from his upper lip
around his nose through his eye and ending at his hairline. Deuce got
right up in Jokers face and looked at him with his one good eye "No
actually we got into a knife fight with our uncle and that fat fuck
tackled us and taught us a lesson. When we woke up we were all patched
up and in Juvy. Anything else boss?" that last "Boss" sounded very
cynical. Joker looked at him hard for a moment then let his menacing
smile take over. "We? care to explain?" Joker questioned "No" Deuce
responded "Right then. Anyway I want you to come up with a training
schedule. I want all the boys to be experts at hand to hand combat. or
at least as good as you HAHHA Just kidding, anyway your training room is
over there and you my friend have the room closest to it. go. NEXT! Ok
Vic you’re the other brain of the group, you any good with building
shit, weapons in particular?" Vic smiled for the first time since joker
met him "Actually that is my specialty." Vic was almost as tall as Bayne
with grayish skin and a bald head, he wore an Ice blue hat with a V in
the center and red sunglasses. He was equally as cut as Bayne, but not
quite as strong. "Superb, then this is your room, I want you to build me
a gun capable of using the gasses, poisons etc. that Krane will be
making. you should have all the supplies you need but if not I guess
we'll go shopping. go. Next on the agenda. Making Bats Crazy, who's good
at riddles?..."
"Computer are any of these Batmobiles still
functional?" Brad inquired. "Yes they all are" Brad was pretty badly
hurt but not incapacitated, he was more than able to go out and
investigate. "Computer, I need some medical supplies, bandages,
ointment, and etcetera. Also whichever Batmobile is the most durable, I
want that one prepped and ready to go, tonight is not over." Computer
sent a medical drone over to Brad to aid him in his bodily repair. While
he was tending to that she fueled and prepped the Batmobile. "Computer
are you capable of building things" Brad asked. Computer responded "Yes
anything I have the ability to build nearly anything as long as the
drones are able to lift the materials." Brad was pleased with this.
"Good, can you replicate this Batsuit and make some additions?" "Yes,
what alterations would you like?" Brad wrapped a bandage around his
abdomen as he spoke "First off I would like Nano-bots in the suit, I
would also like a set implanted in myself so that I can communicate with
you and the suit without making noise, second some sort of blast
protection, that’s twice that son of a bitch used explosives on me..."
Brad winced as he put the final touches on his bandages with the
assistance of the drone. "I wonder what his game is, he said something
about me making him and he's been quite the nuisance recently..."on this
thought Brad remembered the walkie talkie in the remains of the
backseat of the Batmobile. He found it. Still intact. He switched it on
and pressed the button "Joker are you there?"
"Well Bayne my boy, I
would say today was one hell of a success" Joker raised a glass of
champagne and toasted with Bayne. Bayne raised his glass but did not
seem as enthusiastic as Joker. "Whatsa Matta Lad?" Bayne took a sip from
his glass "Today was a good day, I got my freedom and something to do
with myself for once, but now I’m out I have that old itch..." Joker
looked at him puzzled. Bayne continued "...when me and the boys were
waiting for you we realized that none of us has had pussy in quite some
time being locked up in that fucking shithole...." They were interrupted
by a staticy voice coming from across the room "Joker are you there?"
It was Batman! Joker was ecstatic, he skipped across the room like a
school girl. He picked up the Walkie talkie "BATS! so good to hear from
you, it feels like it’s been so long, so how’s the family?" Batman was
not amused " OK asshole, bottom line what do you want? I can't let you
terrorize this city anymore, what will it take to make you cut this shit
out?" Joker smiled so wide he popped one of his self-sutured stitches,
but he was so giddy he didn't even feel the blood trickling down his
cheek "Well Bats this is the thing, I won't stop, I’m having too much
fun, you see when I was just a child I caught a fly, I pulled its wings
off and kept it, more of an experiment than a pet but I guess that’s 2
sides of the same coin, anywho I noticed something, the fly changed, it
adapted, I fed it and kept it in a glass jar, and after a few weeks it
was walking around like it never even had wings, well this sparked an
interesting question, would a human adapt as well and continue living?
the only problem is we don't have wings so I have to pull off arms or
legs and they always bleed to death..."Batman interrupted him again
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?" Joker simply replied
" Nothing, I just like talking with you, no homo AHHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Batman clicked off his Walkie talkie. "DAMMIT I HATE WHEN HE DOES THAT!
no respect. Oh well, now Bayne, back to your request, I think we can do
something about that, gather the crew, tonight we plan, and tomorrow
we're going on our first kidnapping...OW!, but first I have to restitch
this" Joker finally noticed he was bleeding. As Joker was stitching
himself up Vic came into the room. "Joker, I have something for the
crew. Enjoy." He put down a box with watches in it and started to walk
away. Joker was puzzled. He finished his thread and called after Vic.
"Hey what the hell are these things?" Vic continued walking "2 way radio
watches so we can all keep in contact." He turned the corner.
Batman
hopped in the Batmobile "Computer, take me back to the detention
center, I have to investigate and find this maniac before he hurts
anyone else." computer replied "Destination Gotham Juvenile detention
Center set, ETA 13.4 minutes, would you like to set auto pilot?" Batman
looked perturbed "yes. Computer, we really need to work on your vocal
commands." The Batmobile took off towards the detention center. When he
arrived it was a mess. they had already transferred the remaining
children to a new facility. The whole side of Building D was rubble.
Batman hid the Batmobile in the woods not too far from the facility. He
got out and crept along the security fence perimeter until he found a
dark spot and cut a hole in the fence. Batman entered the detention
center grounds and stealthily made his way to Building D. Now to find
clues. "Computer, DTCV mode." Batman's vision turned blue. All the
bodily fluids around him turned Bright Yellow and their tint changed
depending on what fluid it was. Even the remnants of fluids showed
lightly. Fingerprints were everywhere highlighted in Neon Green. He
could see purplish silhouettes in the distance, those must be people.
"What’s this?...."
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